


Shifting Tides

by jairyn



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Chosen One, Gray Jedi, Jedi, Jedi Shadow - Freeform, Original Characters - Freeform, Prophecy, Shadows - Freeform, Sith, The Shadows, foresight
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-15
Updated: 2018-07-15
Packaged: 2019-06-11 03:15:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,568
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15306237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jairyn/pseuds/jairyn
Summary: Jedi master Elenethea is a member of a secret society within the mainstream Jedi known only as The Shadows. They are the origin of the Chosen One prophecy and they’re devoted to seeing it through as it’s meant to happen. This means intervening between the Jedi council and their prodigy, Anakin Skywalker. But the future they foresaw is not what the Jedi council wants to happen and most certainly not what Chancellor Palpatine has planned. Will the shadows succeed at balancing the future and the force, or will their plans collapse around them with the fall of the Republic?





	1. Emerging Shadows

I moved through the shadows, immersing myself in the energy around me. They were up ahead, on the command deck, as I expected. It was time for them to know the truth. To prepare them for their destiny. And to make sure it happens as it was meant to. 

 I shifted into the light a mere few yards from them, moving towards them with determination. They were surprised, of course. Seeing people appear out of thin air can be disconcerting even for the most balanced force users. It was why we rarely revealed ourselves in such a manner. But my mission; what I was sent here to do, was too important to move through traditional channels. 

 "Who are you?“ The boy demanded, his hands instinctively moving towards his lightsaber. I looked him up and down, breathing in his energy. There was darkness in him, yes. There was also light. Good. The ratio was right, too much longer and there’d be no hope. I sized up the Togruta girl standing next to him. She had darkness in her too, but more of the light. It would seem the others had been correct. They are ready now. 

 "I am Jedi master Elenethea, and I have something to show you.” I responded calmly. Neither of them relaxed, unsurprisingly.

 "What are you? And why have we never heard of you?“ He asked, still tense and battle ready. She too, had narrowed her eyes in suspicion, shifting to prepare for a duel.

 "I am a Jedi shadow, and you haven’t heard of me because our identities are kept secret. But had I wished to kill either of you, I would not have revealed myself before the first strike. Now stand down, and come with me.” I responded. They exchanged a glance, little did they know I read them both well. 

 They both relaxed just slightly, but still remained cautious. “No offense, master, but we’re on a mission here.” The boy said. Yes, the one everyone claims is the chosen one. They don’t know the truth. He is as volatile as they say, but that’s because the Jedi council deem not to tell him the whole prophecy, or any of it for that matter. The girl, his padawan, she is more open; more balanced, brighter. Also volatile, but in a different way. He is volatile in the dark. She is volatile in the light. Separate, they are chaos. Together, balance. 

 "What I have to show you is far more important than your current mission. Victory here will not win the war. Come with me and I will show you what needs to be done.“ I claim. It’s not a far out claim. The truth will win the war, just not the way everyone believes of victory. 

 Such was the way with war. It never changed. Everyone fighting for a side rather than the middle. But the middle in this case, doesn’t mean compromising, it means an entirely different solution.

 I took his hand in my left and hers in my right. First step,  _calm_. Second step,  _power_. Third step,  _shift_. Fourth step,  _present_. They looked around, clearly startled to no longer be on the ship, but rather planet-side. Even more miraculous, likely, not the planet they were orbiting. The gift to travel in such a way, was incredibly rare. I was the first to appear with such an ability in a thousand years. All part of the force’s grander design. 

 Timing in matters such as this is absolutely necessary. The unfortunate part however, is that the mission I had to take them away from is also important. Which is why I must leave them and take it over. 

 "Did we actually travel or is this a shared vision of some kind?” The girl asked in wonder.

 "We traveled.“ I replied. Ahead of us was the end of a valley with high cliff faces on three sides. One small cottage with a large garden and a few domesticated animals. It was remote and secure. They would have everything they needed until they were ready. 

 "How is that possible?” He asked. Also curious and oddly excited. 

 "A question for another time, perhaps.“ I responded, pulling on their hands I still held so they turned to look at me. "Has the council ever told you the prophecy of the chosen one?”

 "No,“ The boy responded, his tone laced with anger and resentment. "It’s a stupid title that means nothing.” The Togruta girl glanced up at him and then back at me and shook her head. 

 "That is where you are wrong, Anakin Skywalker.“ I said. "The prophecy is in fact real. It is happening as we speak and that is why I had to bring you both here. Now listen carefully. In all living things, there exists both light and dark. Nothing and no one can have one without the other. Balance is when that creature learns to understand and embrace both sides of themselves. However, in the case of this prophecy, the only way the chosen ‘one’ can bring balance to the force is to first balance themselves. You, boy, are woefully unbalanced." 

 "So you’re going to force a retreat on me to balance myself?” He said in irritation.

 "Not at all.“ I answered. "You, are not the chosen one.” I paused a moment to let my statement sink in. He looked at the girl with him in confusion.

 "Are you saying Ahsoka is?“ He asked surprised.

 "No. You are not the chosen  _one_ , young Skywalker. But rather a chosen  _half_. One person cannot bring balance to the force because one person does not contain enough of either side, and will never be completely in balance. The chosen  _one_ , is a misdirect. Only when you bind yourself to the other half will you both become the chosen one. For the universe to fully be in balance, the beings within it must work and move together in harmony. One person with that much power would hardly be the proper archetype.”

 "What exactly are you saying?“ He asked, shifting nervously. I could feel his fear rising. I knew it would come to this.

 "What I’m saying, Skywalker, is that you AND your padawan are the chosen  _halves_. Alone, you both are volatile and unbalanced. Together, you are perfect harmony.” I took each of their hands I was holding and placed them in each other’s. Then I quickly set my hands on their heads. “Embrace and bind yourselves together so that the chosen one can be created.” I released them and stepped back as they stared at each other. He took her other hand and they were lost in each other. I was forgotten and my work here was done.

 Regretfully, it had come to this. Skywalker’s obsession with the senator, had forced my hand. Had he been able to overcome that driving possessiveness and need, he would have recognized his other half much earlier on. And so much of the war could have been prevented. In essence, I’d been forced to steal parts of their identities and memories, in order to bring them together. 

 But from here on out, they would know nothing but each other, and when they were ready, they would set fire to the galaxy and restore balance to the force. 

 I slipped into the shadows, plucking their lightsabers from their belts and hiding them away while they were distracted and then I returned to the ship, leaving them behind. The fusion had begun. 

 "General?“ The admiral called from the door to the command deck. I turned and headed his way. "The council wishes to speak with you." 

 "Thank you, Admiral Yularen.” I replied stepping up to the holotable as masters Yoda, Kenobi, Windu and the chancellor himself awaited me. 

 "Where is Anakin and his padawan?“ Obi wan asked. 

 "They have business elsewhere, I will be taking their place.” I said calmly. Windu and Yoda exchanged glances, their distrust evident. They were the only two members of the council and the only two Jedi outside the shadows that knew the true prophecy. And they did not approve of what it meant. And they now knew, if I was present, that their efforts to keep it from happening had been overridden. If only they understood the damage they were causing by attempting to stop it. Yet instead, as per usual, they were convinced they knew better than the very people who had seen the prophecy. 

 "This mission is of vital importance,“ the chancellor exclaimed. His darkness seeping out. "Masters, you said yourself that Skywalker was the best hope we had of victory here. Without him, we have already lost.” I heard the disdain in his voice, and tried not to smile. The other Jedi may be easily fooled by such an act, but I was not one of them. As a shadow, I move seamlessly between the light and the dark, I can read all types and know all of their tricks. The others and myself have allowed the chancellor to remain a secret, and now it mattered not, because soon the chosen one will destroy all he’s been fighting for. “Who are you and how dare you take over this mission?” He demanded.

 "With all due respect, your excellency,“ I bowed my head. "My name is of no importance to you. But the mission will be completed and the Republic will have their victory. I am more than capable of leading the expedition.”

 "Complete it, she will, chancellor.“ Yoda interrupted before he could say anything else. I knew his tone. He was angry at appearing ignorant of his own orders actions. But I could not feel sympathy for him. The traditional views of the Jedi would only get them killed in this changing galaxy. If they’d accepted that the people of the prophecy must be treated as exceptions to the rules, then perhaps the shadows would not have been forced to play their hands so early. Or at all, for that matter. "A master, she is. Highly capable.”

 "Thank you, master.“ I said nodding, and then I clicked off the holotable without another word. While the room was empty, I put a call through to the other shadows. 

 "Is it done?” They asked almost simultaneously.

 "Yes, my friends. The fusion has begun.“ I replied.

 "Very good.” The first one said.

 "It’s unfortunate we have to take two weapons off the battlefield, but in time, it will not matter.“ Another one commented. Their presences were obscured through the transmission, but I’d grown up with them, so I knew who spoke what. Just like my own identity, however, theirs did not matter. Amongst ourselves, we identified only as numbers, since there were so few of us; barely twenty. The three I was talking to right now, were the self-appointed leaders. But of all of us, they were the most qualified. The rest accepted that without question. Un, or number one, was the one who saw the prophecy. Deux, number two, and Trois, number three, were with Un when the force gave her the prophetic vision. They have devoted their lives to studying the implications and minutia involved. Quatre, number four, died when the Sith heard of the prophecy and attempted to steal the written word. They only ever got half, though, which is why the chancellor’s gamble on the boy was so laughable; it’s like arming a bomb you have no intention of throwing. I am Cinq, number five. My travel abilities gave me higher number than most because I could help prepare for the coming changes by moving quickly throughout the galaxy. It is also nearly impossible for me to be caught or imprisoned; granting me the special rank of messenger and delivery person. 

 I do not mind my position, of course, because I believe in it. My husband, yes  _husband_ , Six, is one of the most covert secrets the shadows have. He is destructive and fast, and often, when the two of us work together, the enemy never knows what hits them. I bring him in, he does his job, I take him out. But because of the nature of our secret order, we cannot reveal strikes like that too often without suspicions being cast on us. Un, Deux and Trois did not want my identity revealed for this mission, but we had little choice. Since the shadows keep to themselves in a hidden part of the temple on Coruscant, the risk to complete the prophecy was necessary. My real name would mean nothing to most anyways. 

 Six and I are like the boy and his padawan in a lot of ways. Together we are balanced, of one mind and spirit. The Jedi, or I should say, the main or traditional part of the Jedi order, frown on attachments and forbid their followers relationships. And that is where they fail. Relationships with your fellow compatriots and deep respect for them form stronger and more powerful soldiers. That’s why the shadows succeed, where they fail. They use relationships and their benefits for good. It doesn’t mean we don’t mourn or feel the loss of those we lose. But we have found balance and understanding in each other and the force. And in so doing, we strengthen ourselves; since there is no room for doubts or fear. What lays between us is absolute trust. 

 And that is the very reason I was forced to steal the chosen ones’ memories. Their deeply-set fear and shame surrounding attachments distract them from utilizing their strength as one unit. If the council had accepted that their attachment to each other was necessary for balance, there never would have been a risk their ratios would be thrown off. Therefore, the physical involvement of the shadows would have been unnecessary.

 I said goodbye to my friends and closed the holocommunicator. The future was already in motion; the prophecy happening as we speak, it was pointless to waste precious time on what ifs. 

 The mission ahead of me of vital importance; it was the first of many strategic advances that the chancellor had been planning. He meant for a Republic victory here to distract from another more important move. Though hurrying along the fate of the Republic was not ideal, we had to goad him into his final move so that the chosen ones could fulfill their destiny and remake the galaxy. If they returned too early, it could compromise the entire future. 

 He expected Skywalker to be leading this assault, which meant this battle would turn in our favor easily. But by pulling Skywalker and his padawan off this mission, the chancellor has a choice to make; let it be a victory for the Republic without his hero crusader, or double the Separatist war effort and prolong it. 

 I had a feeling resistance will be higher than originally orchestrated, because our move angered him. But still, he needs the Republic to win here to gain more power. I could sense he was impatient to make the final move. This was supposed to be the beginning of the end of his years of patient planning. And we just stole his star player. To expect him to make a wrong move out of spite, however, was to underestimate his entire character. All we could do now was attempt to meet his patched situations. And force his hand in revealing his designs. 

 When he realizes that Skywalker has gone missing, he will be forced into initiating it without his kingpin. It will be chaos, and our only hope rests in the chosen one, returning to lead what’s left into a new, grander vision of the future. A place where light and dark are not hoarded like possessable entities. Where we are returned to our balanced natures, and all those that sought control have been eradicated. It wasn’t the future the Jedi believed in. And it certainly wasn’t the future the Sith demanded. Both powers equal in their destruction of the balance. And both will pay for it.

 I once felt as the traditional Jedi do. I once believed their code of darkness versus light. But as I grew and learned, moving through the shadows and across the galaxy; I listened and observed. Two sides to every story; everything was black or white. But something nagged at me, perhaps there was a third way. One that constructed something magnificent from the pieces and fragments of both sides. 

 And it was on Morroband, the ancient homeworld of the Sith, in their dark temple, faced with the darkest of darkness, that I found the light. That experience lit a fire in my soul, I will never forget it. I saw the universe in harmony, a balance between two opposite dangers. One side of me lived in the shadows, one side in the light. And as I looked down at who I’d become, I didn’t see two separate halves, divided by a clear line; but rather a mixture of the two. A swirling of gray. When I returned to Coruscant, I told master Yoda of my experience. He dismissed it as the darkness finally corrupting me. He told me to meditate and cleanse myself with light.

 I knew no better, so I did as he instructed. No matter how hard I tried, however, the taint never left me. The darkness had made itself at home inside my soul. I had failed as a Jedi. Or so I thought. It was that day of utter despair, that I met Six. He revealed himself to me and begged me to follow him, he had told me it was time for me to go home. I didn’t understand at first, but I took his hand anyways. He led me down to a secret part of the temple that I had never even known existed. There I met other gray people like myself. 

 In the beginning, I thought these were the Jedi cast offs, but I quickly learned that no, the people of the enclave were more balanced and possessed more strength of will and spirit than most of the other force users I’d ever encountered. And they willingly taught me how to reach my full potential. And it was in that perfect balance, that gray area, that my travel talent emerged. Balance in myself was when I learned what I was truly capable of. And now I understood, what these other gray Jedi taught me, were things the traditional order never could. And like them, I now live to lead others to their same power. 

 Which is more difficult than you’d presume. People don’t like their beliefs challenged. They shun those that see things differently. So we turned our attention to picking up lost souls; Jedi or Sith that have fallen from their devout paths and are ready to learn a third possibility. At least that was our primary objective until Un had the prophecy of the chosen one. All attention was now put towards preparing for the dystopian path ahead. Preparing to travel the difficult path, led by the chosen one, to emerge on the other side as guides for the survivors. What the Jedi saw as the end, and the Sith saw as destruction in their favor, was only the beginning of something bigger. The time of fire was upon us.


	2. Chapter 2

“Captain Rex, is it? A word if I may?” I said to one of the clones down in the hanger. He had a way about him, I liked him already. He stood tall and confident, as a leader, but he had a softer edge too. These were the things I liked about people, things that gave them three dimensions. That you could be both strong and soft, confident and unsure.

Though I was strongly against the Republic’s use of a clone army, slaves as they were, I still respected and admired every single one of them. Proud to stand beside them in battle if I must, but also mourning the loss of them when they fell. Many, even some amongst the Jedi, believed them to be disposable. They existed purely to serve a purpose. If it was possible to free them from this fate, I would do so in a heartbeat. Every life created only to be taken away caused further disruption of the force. And showed in stark clarity, at least to those of us that we’re paying attention, how far we’ve truly fallen.

Rex glanced down and saw the lightsaber hilt hanging from my belt and stepped up to attention. “Yes sir!” He said, obedient as expected. The clones with him saluted me.

“At ease, men. Thank you.” I said. This was my first time leading an army, and I was not looking forward to it. After a life in the shadows, undercover, stealthy, infiltrating and destroying from within… it was weird to be standing in front of so many people. Especially soldiers that would ultimately be looking to me for direction. It made me feel… _exposed_ … and I did not like it.

As Captain Rex and I moved away from the others, I could tell he was sizing me up. I didn’t blame him. Surely he’d heard by now that a different Jedi would be taking over this mission. And like me, is equally curious as to whom he’d be working with. “Pardon my curiosity, sir…” he started carefully, “but what circumstances brings you aboard?”

“I’m afraid that general Skywalker and his padawan were needed elsewhere.” I replied vaguely, knowing that he would understand that he didn’t need to know anymore of the situation. “Captain, I hear great things about you and the 501st. I look forward to serving with you.” He bowed in acknowledgement of the compliment.

“Thank you sir.”

“I know that Skywalker encourages his team to be creative thinkers, and in that way, I am counting on you to help me come up with other solutions as necessary.”

“Of course.” He said.

“As you have probably already deduced, I’m not accustomed to being in charge, captain. And though it is a poor way to instill confidence in my men, I wanted you to know. But regardless of my lack of leadership experience, I will stand and fight by your sides. I will protect you and your men as best as I can, and I will respect you as well. All I ask in return is that you speak freely with me. I do not care about protocol nearly as much as I care about the lives around me, and I need to know that the person that I’m serving with will make it clear if I’m out of line. Can I count on you for that, captain?” I asked.

“I will do what I can, sir.” He commented. I could feel from him uncertainty and yet that I intrigued him. The shadows, and many of the gray Jedi, never served with the clones, so I imagine my views will be quite curious to them. I knew enough about this man in front of me that I could trust him with my life and the lives of those around us. I was grateful for the opportunity to work along side the best. The chosen ones leadership already evident in those closest to him. Speaking to Rex gave me a sense of calm about the future that was coming. For when we survive the storm, the rebirth will be nothing short of miraculous. And I will do whatever it takes to protect those that are ready for the changing tide.

I called the clones to order and briefed them on the mission. Many of them already knew why we were here, but now I needed to inform them of the new strategy. Rex, Artoo and I were going to take a fighter and board the command ship. Sneak through and place bombs on the reactor core. Once away, we’d detonate the bombs. The battle cruisers would then move forward to engage the remaining frigates. Bomber squad would attempt to draw any ships that lagged behind towards the Indomitable until they were within firing range. The also had to play cleanup with the vulture droids. Once all frigates were occupied, the landing party would slip through the blockade and we’d rendezvous on the surface.

It sounded simple enough. If only executed it was that easy. Nobody questioned that Rex and I would be able to get aboard the command ship, nor how we’d fight our way to the reactor. I supposed that Skywalker’s plans probably sounded just as farfetched and they had no reason to question it.

I moved over to R2D2 while they prepped the ships to prepare for the attack. I knelt down in front of the little white and blue astromech and studied him. He was a curiosity when it came to droids. I knew all about him, of course. When you study the chosen one long enough, you learn what’s important to them and who’s around them. Artoo was unwaveringly loyal to him. Unusual for a droid, but there was more to it than that.

I set my hand on his dome top and felt into the force. There were many emotions surrounding this droid. Loss stood out the strongest. I suspected Artoo likely witnessed and recorded much of what fed the darkness in Anakin Skywalker. But there was more. Droids often learned and acquired, habits or quirks, similar to their masters. It’s a feature designed to make them seem more lifelike than mechanical. But what of droids that spent a lot of time around a Jedi? I’m not sure it’s possible for them to use the force, persay… but I think it’s reasonable to suspect they have some knowledge or sense of the force. Maybe a rudimentary understanding, but all that much more impressive. If any could feel or use the force, my bet would be on this one.

“Hello, little buddy.” I said softly. He beeped a few times. “I know I’m not your master, but I have a special mission for you that requires your special talents. Are you willing to put your precision calibrations to the test?” He made a few curious whistles and told me he was ready for anything. I smiled in response.

As I told the little droid exactly what I was going to need from him, I started getting nervous. What I was about to do was unbelievably dangerous and not just because of the droids that waited on the other side. Precision shifts like this required serious concentration and energy. And worse, I wasn’t just risking my own life, I’d also be risking Rex’s and the little astromech in front of me. I’ve traveled all over the galaxy using this talent, but it wasn’t as simple as just wanting to go somewhere.

Shifting required knowing as much about your destination as possible; where it is, what the terrain or location is like, maps, coordinates, etc. The place you’re shifting to has to be known, well, maybe not. But for a talent as rare as mine, I can’t in good conscience risk my life experimenting with reckless endeavors.

Shifting onto ships is trickier. You have to know exactly where they are in space and you have to be able to project their path using speed, direction and coordinates. Battleships, like the Indomitable, are easier in the sense that they have large open areas and are typically transmitting live coordinates constantly to friendly vessels. The open areas give you some wiggle room if you miscalculate. And the updating data can be correlated and projected. Even so, trying to shift onto a ship in hyperspace is probably suicide because you never know exactly where they’ll be, and the data stream is often interrupted.

So as you can imagine, shifting into a tiny little fighter moving through a battle is an absolutely crazy idea. Add to that, shifting another person with you at the same time. I’ve never attempted a precision shift of this caliber before, but I had to find a way around this blockade, and I felt it was my duty to risk as few lives as possible. Normally, I’d do it alone, but with something this risky, I need someone there to watch my back. Which is where Rex comes in. I need someone I can trust to make sure I survive this shift, of sound mind and body. Because honestly, precision shifting like this was useless if the first thing that happened was I collapse in the middle of a hundred battle droids.

Artoo’s job would be feeding me constant coordinates and projected paths and directions of the fighter at all times. That was for the shift off the enemy ship anyways. The shift on would require doing it from a small moving vehicle into an unknown number of enemies while likely in the middle of a firefight. I really wish I had a better idea.

After briefing Artoo on his role, I took a few moments to meditate to restore my balance. The last thing I needed was my fears getting the better of me. I also sent a quick note to my husband to tell him I loved him in case this didn’t go as planned. And then I built myself up, relaxing into the arms of my greatest ally, the force. The calculations and research needed for every shift were only part of the battle. The force gave me different information about what awaited me on the other side; equally important. Trois was usually the one that helped me do precision shifts, but she wasn’t here now and that job would fall to a droid. An incredible droid, yes. One that even appeared to be able to sense the force to some degree, but technical data was only some of what I needed. For the rest, I’d have to rely on myself and my beliefs. And my strong desire to not get the best clone captain, especially one favored by the chosen one, killed.

The command ship was in view, vulture droids had come out to meet us. I’d expected that. We dodged and weaved, taking out as many as possible, and closing in fast. I took a couple deep breaths and told Artoo to take over. It was time for part one. I had to find balance. “Take my hand, Captain.” I said, reaching over my shoulder. “And make sure you’re holding everything we’re taking with us so I can account for it.”

“Uh, sir?” He asked surprised. “Are we jumping out?”

“In a way.” I laughed. “What we’re about to do is going to feel a little disconcerting, but I need you to trust me. The moment you start to feel physical again, get your feet under you.”

“Um, okay.” He shrugged and put his helmet on, then he grabbed the backpack full of thermal detonators, setting it in his lap. He then reached forward and took my hand. The ship shuddered as Artoo barrel rolled to avoid getting hit by a canon. I closed my eyes, sinking into the force, becoming aware of my own mass and Rex’s and the impressions we made in the air around us. The stream of information Artoo fed me through the ear piece, lulling me into a trance. Deep breath.  _Calm_. Deep breath.  _Power_. Deep breath.  _Shift_.


	3. Chapter 3

First it felt like my atoms were being ripped apart. Then all sense of material things around us faded until it was only the force. We were then jerked through space until it felt like something was rematerializing around us. There was a split second of awareness in which I had to pull him out of the force too, and then everything was solid again. Deep breath.  _Present_. I barely got my hands up before hitting the wall in front of me. I rested my cheek against it, breathing heavy and not wanting to tell him how close I’d just been to shifting into the wall. Clearly I hadn’t counted on the command ship moving.

 "What on…“ he didn’t get a chance to finish his exclamation of surprise. "Incoming!” He whispered, grabbing my arm and pulling us into a corner. I staggered feeling lightheaded and he caught me. This was why I’d brought him. 

 I blinked trying to clear my head of the close call and get my bearings. At least for the moment, nothing was firing at us, so whatever it was that had been incoming, had yet to see us. Tired as I was from the shift, we needed to stealth now.

 I tried to close my eyes in concentration, but I felt wobbly. “Are you okay, sir?” Rex asked. His surprise forgotten in favor of concern. 

 "I will be in a minute.“ I replied, resting my hand on his shoulder to steady myself. They say you can lose your stomach in sudden drops, but it felt a bit like I left part of me behind. I’d accounted for everything. We were here, we were both in one piece. Even if it didn’t feel like it. I was a bit troubled by how much energy this shift had sapped. I had a long day ahead of energy intensive talents, and this shift was only the beginning. "Are we safe for the moment, captain?” I asked.

 "Clankers in sight, but they haven’t detected us.“ He reported, peeking out around the corner. Then he reached into his pack and pulled out a small water pack and handed it to me. 

 I looked at it for a moment and then nodded. "Thank you,” I said, chugging it down. I felt better already. And I felt stupid. How had I neglected basic necessities in my calculations and plan? Rex didn’t say anything to rub it in though. I appreciated his presence more and more by the second. And actually found myself wondering how often he had to provide sustenance for the two Jedi he served under.  Probably more often than anyone wanted to admit. 

 “There’s at least a hundred battle droids between us and the reactor.” He said looking over the small holographic map projected from his wrist band.

“How are we going to get there by ourselves?”

 “We’re going to walk.” I said calmly. Even beneath his helmet, I was certain he looked at me like I couldn’t be serious.

 “Time’s up,” he said after a moment, repositioning himself in order to defend our position. Feeling my strength returning, I set my hand on his shoulder and shook my head. This strategy depended on the enemy not knowing we were on board. I glanced down the corridor and saw several battle droids patrolling our way. 

 I waved my other hand in front of me, dispersing the force around us and fading our presences into the shadows. He didn’t speak, but I could feel his surprise at witnessing himself disappear. We sat in silence for a few minutes as the droids came to the end of the hallway, saw nothing and turned around, leaving us behind. In the familiar shadows, I felt more like myself again. Who knew you could find safety and comfort in the darkness too?

 I let go of his shoulder and stepped out of the shadows. He looked up at me. “How?” he asked.

 “As I’m sure you’ve witnessed, captain, every Jedi have different abilities and talents. I am what is known as a Jedi shadow. I told you already, I’m not accustomed to leading an army. That is because shadows can obscure themselves and others in the force, both our physical and spiritual presence. Our strength is infiltration and stealth. So, we are usually…  _spies_.” I said, realizing how weird it was to say the last word aloud. I knew I could trust him, that wasn’t the problem. It was that this entire mission, and the circumstances leading up to it, were pulling me out of my comfort zone at an alarmingly fast rate. 

 He glanced behind him to see that the coast was still clear and then back at me and nodded. There was nothing more I needed to say. I knew he understood the gravity of the situation. “Unfortunately, it will require more awkward hand holding.” I tried to joke in order to lighten the serious mood that had fallen over us. 

 “If you can turn us invisible so we can walk right past these clankers without a fight, you can hold whatever you want.” I could hear the smile in his voice and grinned in response.

 “I know you’re always ready for a fight, but blowing them to smithereens without them ever knowing we were here will be much more satisfying in the long run.” I said and he nodded in agreement. “Ready, captain?” I asked after he pulled the backpack all the way on. 

 “Yes, sir.” He replied. I stepped in front of him and reached out my hand. As he took it and we shifted into the shadows, I felt a certain amount of glee from him. I could imagine how exciting turning invisible could be to the average person.

 I myself, found it quite therapeutic even though it required using what the Jedi considered ‘dark side’ abilities since you’re essentially hiding in the force. You can’t use the light to hide, for obvious reasons. Not to mention, the dark side is tempestuous and obscuring. But only to those that do not understand or respect its power. I find a certain amount of calm in the darkness, but I most certainly wouldn’t want to stay there all the time. The dark side is chaotic. 

“I know we’re trying to be stealthy, but I would really like to walk up to a clanker and punch it in the face. It would never know what hit it." He whispered from behind me. I was glad he was feeling comfortable enough with me to speak freely as I’d requested. Protocol and the chain of command were important elements of war for smooth operations. I understood that, I really did. However, I also understood, based on my experiences with the other shadows and the other gray Jedi, that when you feel comfortable with someone; when you can put them at ease, especially if they’re below you, they will fight harder and more efficiently. And now that Rex and I were starting to get a sense of each other, we could now communicate instinctively and complete this mission much more easily. We could act as one unit, rather than two. Relationships and bonds were important. I would always believe that, no matter what the traditional Jedi said. No force sensitive in the history of the galaxy had ever fallen to the dark side because they loved someone. But many had fallen because they hadn’t been allowed to love. That was why I’d had to do what I did to the chosen halves.

 The Jedi’s rules of attachment had created so much fear, shame and self-doubt surrounding their relationships with others and especially between the two of them, that it drove a wedge of distrust and pain between them. And if left unchecked… would have devastating consequences, not just between the people they cared about, but also throughout the galaxy. It was like stabbing a sword into someone’s chest and expecting them to continue to function to peak efficiency while slowly bleeding out. It’s a slow and unnatural death and any that claim it’s better that way are the ones that have truly fallen. There’s pain in loving people yes, but it’s a bearable pain. Like a broken bone rather than a festering wound. Bones heal, untreated infections eventually take everything from you; destroying you from the inside out.

 I didn’t change their identities when I left them there together, I simply hid the parts that were getting in the way; the fear mostly. Skywalker hadn’t forgotten the senator at all. The strong negative emotions surrounding her had simply been pushed aside for the moment. It sounded bad, to manipulate them in such a way. But leaving him and his padawan isolated like that, wasn’t about romance. They didn’t need to get physical to experience each other in that way. If they did, it wasn’t because I made them, it would be because those feelings already existed there, but the blinders were gone. The imposed isolation was about giving them a chance to get to know each other on a soul level. To read each other intuitively and to not let fear or distrust cloud their judgement or tear at their connection. 

 Remove the fear in yourself and you find balance between the light and dark within you; you accept who you really are. Remove the fear between two people, especially two very powerful force users, and you find the balance in each other because you can finally accept all aspects of yourself and those around you. It was all about the balance. And gray Jedi swore to protect the balance at all costs. And that was exactly what we were doing now by helping the prophecy along. If balance was lost, the galaxy would never know peace again. 

 I smiled even though he couldn’t see it. “Maybe on the way out.”

 “I’ll hold you to that.” He chuckled and went back to his serious, ready-for-action calm.

We made it to the reactor without incident. I kept watch while he set the charges. It was difficult keeping us both stealthed while moving around and hanging off perilous ledges. Since I had to hold both him and the machine and move at the same time. But we got through it, working together in silence as though we’d always done it. 

Once everything was in place, I found an opportunity to keep my promise to Rex. He took an obscene amount of pleasure in severing its head from its body with one well placed punch from point blank range. We both laughed as it fell in pieces down the reactor shaft.

 "That felt good, sir. Thank you.” He whispered as a sense of peace and satisfaction rested around him. Revenge wasn’t the Jedi way, but there was no harm in occasional pettiness. Especially for soldiers who’s lives practically consisted of fighting these machines on a daily basis. Jedi were supposed to exercise more restraint than that, but he wasn’t a Jedi. And I understood what it meant to him in the long run. Even if it was just one useless droid. 


	4. Chapter 4

After listening to Artoo’s stream of information for a few minutes, I told him to stay in a straight path and a steady speed. Obviously dangerous when you’re being attacked, but if he rolled, weaved, or turned right as I shifted, we might not hit the ship at all, or worse, end up partially inside the shell of the fighter. I don’t think I need to go into detail to explain the internal damage and trauma that could cause. Especially after my close call with the door earlier. 

 Once Rex was in position behind me, holding onto my shoulders and both of us bent our knees like we were sitting, I reached into the force to attempt the shift. I wanted to breathe a sigh of relief that the precision shift had worked, but right as I was rematerializing in the ship, I felt a strong pang in my chest. Like someone had ripped a bandage off an old wound. And suddenly all I could think about was returning to the command ship. The feeling getting stronger by the second. I double checked that nothing had physically hurt me there. 

 I was exhausted though. I doubted that I could do two more precision shifts like this, but I had to go back. I had to!

 "Sorry Rex,” I said quickly. “I’ll be right back.” And without waiting for a response, I shifted purely on instinct. Trusting in the force to guide me to the source of this old wound. I staggered, using the wall to catch myself. Stealthing before I had much chance to recover. My body was screaming at me. It was unnatural to rip yourself apart so much. But I stumbled along, following the trail blindly. I couldn’t quite make out what was calling me back here. I didn’t know why there’d be anything on a command ship that would be irresistible to me, but I couldn’t fight it. My instincts had kicked my body into gear, fueled purely by adrenaline. 

 In the back of my mind I knew I was endangering the mission. I knew everything we’d been fight for might go out the window, but I couldn’t control the  _need_  to pursue this feeling. It didn’t feel like a trap, in fact… There was no way the separatists could’ve known I’d be taking over this mission. But whatever I was running towards was meant for me. Non force users called it coincidence… but I could not. The separatists couldn’t have known I’d be here, but the force knew I would be. And the force was alive. It’s impressive plans and designs seen only by those that paid attention. This was one such moment. I was led here. Whatever was calling me,  _I_  was meant to find. 

 I leaned against a cell door, my heart pounding as I tried to gain control enough to wait until the patrol of droids went by and I was alone in the corridor. I was tired, my head was spinning, and whatever had sent me into this spiral was waiting on the other side of the door. I just had to open it. I was scared though. I’d just been talking about balance and it’s importance, but right now I felt none. Right now, I ached so strongly for what was on the other side of this door. 

 I pressed the button and fell to my knees before I completely registered what I was seeing as a tiny little girl flew into my arms. “Zoe?” I whispered, my voice cracking in surprise and pain. My arms tightened around her body as I pulled her close. She was so thin and frail. “I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry!” I repeated, rocking us back and forth. “I thought you died. I didn’t know… my darling! I’m so sorry!” I felt her tears stream down my neck as she buried her face in it. My daughter was alive… my daughter…  _alive_ … 

 It took a few minutes, though it felt like eternity, for me to wrap my head around this revelation. It had been two years since we last saw her. The accident… still vivid in my dreams. She was gone. She was dead. There was no chance she’d survived it. It had taken so long to wade through the pain. So long to find balance again. But the shadows had supported us every step of the way. We found peace in their community. In their understanding. They willfully unbalanced themselves to help us make peace. And eventually… we did… we found peace in ourselves again. We missed her, everyday. Losing her was like losing a piece of ourselves. It hurt, but you learned to re-calibrate. You learned to go on, just differently;  _changed_. 

 But she had survived. She was here. She had somehow been captured. And I didn’t even want to think about how much she must have suffered. If there’d truly been a real possibility she could have survived, my husband and I never would have stopped looking. It was a miracle. I didn’t know how else to see it. 

 I scooped her up feeling dazed. She was six now. Two precious years of her childhood stolen by something. But she was here now, she was alive. And somehow we’d make it up to her. I kissed the side of her pretty face and took a deep breath. I didn’t feel calm, but I felt power. And I shifted anyways. 

 I was present in the cockpit, my beautiful baby girl still cradled in my arms. Rex behind me. Artoo transmitting data; beeping wildly. I was here but not really. The world was moving on, but my sense of time had warped. I felt like I might pass out. My energy drained. The mission endangered. I had to pull myself together. 

 I felt Rex nudge me on the shoulder and I reached up to take the two food bars he handed me. I gave one to Zoe and took a bite of the other. The fuzziness cleared some and I picked up my holocommunicator and called Six. 

 "I found our daughter!“ I practically shouted as soon as he answered. "She’s alive! She’s alive!” I was crying now. My face streaked with tears. I was a mess, but I didn’t have to say anything else. I saw his eyes widen as she waved at him.

 "I’m on my way!“ Was all he said. I should have told him no. I should’ve said he’d have to wait. I should’ve told him the mission came first but instead I nodded. What right did I have to deny him this? He’d missed her just as much. 

 Rex seemed to understand my state of mind and he took over. He instructed Artoo to return to the Indomitable. Halfway back, he detonated the charges we’d set. The plan was moving. Everything was happing as it was meant to. I just didn’t feel like a part of it anymore. My daughter was alive. She was here. I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t think about anything else except that Six was coming. If I’d had more energy, if I’d been more with it. I might have shifted us both home and forgot about the mission entirely. But I was too tired. I had to finish what we’d started. Everything the shadows had been working towards for so many years, could not go up in smoke because I lost my balance at the most critical moment.

 My daughter was important yes. And obviously the force had a plan for her or I never would have found her. But I couldn’t endanger the fate of the entire galaxy for her. I would have to trust that the force had brought her back not to just take her away again.  She’d be safe on the battle cruiser. When this mission was over, I’d see her again. Everything would be okay. I trusted in the balance. I trusted in the force. Everything would be okay. 

 It hadn’t been part of the plan for us to return to the Indomitable. But it was necessary. After sending her to the med bay with a lieutenant, Rex handed me another food bar and a water pack and we were on our way again. No time for chatter, no time to think or feel, just focus on the mission. On the lives around me that needed protection. 

 We helped the bombers lure in the frigates. When the blockade was broken, and the path clear, I ordered the landing party to move in. We flew around covering their passage, but the vulture droids were preoccupied and we all slipped by easily. 

 I was still a bit dazed about everything as we got closer to the surface, but distance put my mind back on the mission at hand. I couldn’t allow myself to think about what happened or how it was possible, that only made it hard to focus. All I could do right now was get through this mission without the distraction getting any of us killed.

 “Feeling better, sir?” Rex asked me as if he sensed my struggle. If I didn’t know better, I’d think he was a Jedi. But then again, perhaps he’d spent enough time around them to pick up on similarities.

 “I am, captain. Thank you.” I responded, pushing aside the rush of emotions finding my daughter had created. These men were counting on me to keep a clear head. I could sense his curiosity from where he sat behind me, but seeming to understand asking would distract me further, he restrained. He was a good man, and it didn’t come from programming. Of that I was sure. His training and heritage obvious, but his intuition, compassion and loyalty were off the charts. And I found myself truly honored to have a chance to work with a leader like him. I could see Skywalker and Tano’s influence in his behavior; in both how he was like them and how he balanced them. I liked his easy going, yet professional manner. I also liked his sense of humor that he hid well, but came out and unexpected moments. 

 I personally had not spent much time around the clones but I watched them from a distance. And I could see the many ways they were alike besides genetics, but I also admired the individuality they each possessed. It amazed me more and more how so many people that were bred to be identical, were really not at all. They were as varied as any other species and I felt strongly that was influenced by the force to help remind us that they were more than machines. Not everyone paid attention to that though, to others they were an army of one mind, fighting a war they didn’t dare. Though the circumstances that brought them into being were so terrible and nefarious, I was grateful they existed. And I wanted to preserve their lives as much as I would any others. They were soldiers, true. They were created to fight and die for things that meant nothing to them. But that didn’t mean we, as their leaders, should hurry along that fate.

 The circumstances surrounding their creation were cloudy and suspicious. The fact that the majority of both the Jedi order and the Republic didn’t seem concerned in the slightest on how we had an instant army before we even knew there was a war… was bothersome. The shadows had been trying to uncover for years, the truth behind their creation, but it was difficult. We knew the Chancellor had a role in it, of that we were sure. He had boasted he’d been planning it for awhile expecting that relations with the Confederacy of Independent States, the Separatists, would eventually degrade to war. So many people had taken him simply at his word. It only made him so much more impressive in their minds. But it seemed no one in any position of power asked important questions, like; how had he planned or funded the creation of so many clones before he was even the chancellor, and without budget approval from the Senate? Or one beyond that, how did he know to start the creation of an army before the Separatists even became a thing?

 The Jedi weren’t exactly known for asking big questions like that, relying on the force to guide them at all turns. The force was capable of that, to be sure, but it didn’t allow for a larger picture of what was going on. The gray Jedi, like the shadows, have all seen the light side and the dark side of the force. We’ve all seen how the two halves flow between them, and we are extremely sensitive to the minute changes of the force and how it influences the balance. Because of that, we tend to see the bigger picture. How one thing cascades into many others. To us, the prophecy of the chosen one connected all the dots. And ever since, everything we’ve learned has set itself neatly inside the puzzle. A puzzle that for whatever reason, the other Jedi refuse to see. The force will guide them they claim. If something was wrong, they’d know it. These are the same people that claim the force is clouded and they’re having trouble seeing it. The problem is that it’s not clouded, it’s never been clearer than it is now. They’re just denying what it’s showing. They deny the parts they don’t believe in or understand. And by doing so… they’re endangering everyone.

 Which was why the shadows finally emerged. We, as part of the gray Jedi, live to preserve the balance. And in most cases, that means staying out of things; letting it happen as it was meant to. Helping wherever we can to tip the scale one way or the other. Yes, sometimes to the light and sometimes to the dark. But the future without the chosen one would be so dark and pained, there would never be balance again. Not real balance anyways. Maybe things that masqueraded as it, but the force would forever be askew. And if we were meant to do nothing about it, why would the prophecy ever have been given? It was hard to imagine that the force could need our help to right itself, but then again, if we destroy ourselves, the force would have nothing to govern. 

 The problem was, it wasn’t just the Jedi that weren’t asking questions. Neither the senate, nor the common people, asked the questions. Content to drift along and follow rather than step up and at least start the conversation. The gray Jedi had no representation in both the Jedi order or the democracy, despite coming from all walks of life. And now, all we could do was work to prepare for what was coming and rescue any that were willing to come along. We just had to trust it was enough.


End file.
